#than masc gay guys
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madtomedgar · 2 years ago
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I feel like there's nondenominational gay/trans/bi/queer masculinity or femininity, where people feel connection to both butches and leather daddies or bears, or to both high femmes and queens, but there is also nondenominational gender nonconformity, where one feels connection to both butches and femmey gay men. Yeah.
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charonte-simi · 3 months ago
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intentionally letting my facial hair grow out a little but also wearing a crop top and not binding for this metal show cause I wanna give as many people confusing boners as possible
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vulpinesaint · 1 year ago
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transition goals (at a point in my life where i can say "halloween is an extremely important holiday to me. you may have guessed this" and just gesture to myself and get laughs from classmates)
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harocat · 2 years ago
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People really think that canonically HC is built like a tank.
Where are they getting this though. He's described as slender and lanky. He's certainly broader than XL, and it says as much, but XL is a small guy. He's one of the shortest characters in the cast (though he is ofc extremely physically strong, so he's buff in his own way).
Like there is only ONE version of the series; adaptation, official art, etc. where HC is BIG, and it's the one where he didn't start off that way but expanded into nineties yaoi proportions as the series went on. He's good in the early manhua and early manhua official art.
Like isn't this the first official art of HC??
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That's not huge or swole or tanky. that's just a... tall guy. But over and over in this fandom you're 'ignoring canon' if you deny that he's huge like *Ember's HC.
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xan-the-emo-trans-man · 8 months ago
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your ex breaks your heart? Just show up looking hot in his favorite color
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anhonestslut · 2 years ago
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do you ever think about how justin goes completely against brian’s type based on what we see in the show. like aside from that lookalike he hired, we almost exclusively see him with the same type of guy over and over. i don’t have any thoughts about this it’s just. interesting 
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hantii · 2 years ago
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I… I think I’m genderfluid, and I think I need to start actively accepting it. Most of the time, Im so comfortable with they/them and identifying purely as androgyne non binary, that I suppress the part of me that, at times, longs to be viewed as male, and to be called he/him. Im so, so scared to accept that part of my identity. Being androgyne is so important to me, and having a more masculine identity is scary because it feels like it invalidates that.
Im going to start asking some trusted close friends to start experimenting with more masculine language and name for me. And allowing myself to present masculine and acknowledge my manhood at the times when I feel like one.
Its scary, because so many people seem to hate men. I don’t wanna be something people hate… Yet I’m sick of hiding this part of me just for the sake of other people.
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tiercel · 1 year ago
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In honor of pride month im thinking about my funniest gayguy memories
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jizzan · 1 year ago
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Hey not so gentle reminder that not assuming gender to strangers means not referring to them with any gendered language, not just throwing all genders into one sentence and hope something sticks
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t4tstarvingdog · 2 years ago
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okay so like, i'm a gay guy pretty solidly but if i never transition and i grow my hair out long again and learn to wear dresses more often and if a woman fell in love with me i could be a lesbian. i could do it. i know i could
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jabeur · 1 month ago
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whenever i'm with large groups of people i have at least one moment of Oh God. People Think I'm Either A Man Or A Woman. it's like getting shocked every time lmao party meme but it's they don't know i'm nonbinary
#he looked scared! like i might think badly of him or treat him differently!#i have many gay friends!#i did? kind of come out? to my coworker?#but i mean she already knew i'm gay lmao it's so obvious when you assume i'm a man that i'm not straight 😭😭#i did have to make a split second decision to say either bi or gay and i said gay 😭 i do use both interchangeably personally#bc i use gay as like an umbrella term for not straight#but i know people tend to think of only homosexual and heterosexual lol bisexual people don't exist <3#but really i didn't feel like doing a lesson on what bisexuality is if it was needed so 😭😭#my coworker was cool with it i was like i mean you probably know already but i'm gay lol and she said yeah i knew but it's your business#but um she was kinda outing our ex coworker? and i know she told me bc i'm obviously gay myself but.......#it's not cool to tell me when he only mentioned his bf to her and she said he looked scared that she might judge him.... like it's not cool#to tell period but especially since it was clearly said bc he trust *her* with the info#if they're openly out and the person already knows well ofc whatever you can talk about it but it wasn't like that so#but the thing IS....... that i only really realised she was outing him afterwards? my bad truly. i was uncomfortable in the moment#but for some reason it didn't click why til later#bc like at first i thought it was bc she said something like 😭😭 girl. how should he know you'd be cool with it. we live in This Society.#so i was uncomfy like uhhh. and i said well i mean you probably know already but i'm gay too and even if there's a p high chance that peopl#will be okay with it in this day & age (i didn't say but. bit different for trans ppl. i'm not out as trans) we can never know#so it makes sense to be scared to say it!#and she was like yes! but i am okay with it and he looked so scared! i truly know so many and i love them even more than others!#😭😭😭😭😭 she means well but seriously HOW SHOULD HE KNOW ALL THAT 😭😭😭😭 it doesn't work like that girl.....#i mean ? *i* never told her i'm gay 😭😭 and i've known her for 2 years and a half almost. this guy worked with us for like a few months#anyway i wish i was quicker to realise bc i would've told her out on it like...... really not your thing to tell other people 😵‍💫😵‍💫#still. i am glad i said it. even when it's obvious and wouldn't need telling#it's NOT easy to like. know that everyone knows. not for me at least. especially with the added layer of being trans (AND nonbinary)#bc i don't think ppl i haven't told know that. i think cis ppl are quite bad at like.. knowing transmasc ppl exist lol#so i go by he/him only in italian (no other options lol) and i'm. not really completely masc and don't “pass” super well but when#i present myself as nico and talk abt myself w masculine words ppl just either ignore that and go she! :) or think alright. (cis) gay man#and at work it's the latter after i've worked there for over 2 years. like i'm not out as trans so ppl draw those conclusions#i don't think it'd shock ppl if i said i'm trans but simply put cis ppl at least cis italian ppl dont know shit abt trans men and transmasc
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callmeethaniguess · 5 months ago
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This is so unbelievably real. I understand where people are coming from (in some areas) but there is such a negative idea of masculinity within the queer community that it’s starting to feel childish, like vaspider said. The shit said to trans men and masculine is so fucked up too. The idea that someone being a man is the part of them that is bad is a poisonous thing. It’s incredibly dangerous and is not only working to rip the community apart, but is adhering to fucked up gender norms, in a way. Being a man in inherently not a bad thing, but there are, of course, a lot of bad bad men out there. But even then that doesn’t give people the right to just be shitty to any person they come across that might be a man and say shit like what was shown in the screenshot above. Like shit like this is what pushes men into incel spaces, and saying that all men are evil just allows for more shitty men to do shitty things under the guise of what is basically the adult version of “boys will boys”
alienating men and masculine aligned people is just fucking weird. Especially in queer spaces. Masculinity for some reason is now considered the antithesis of queer, when that is not the case? Queerness doesn’t equal femininity, queerness is just something outside of the strict societal norms that a lot of us are starting to, even if we don’t realize it, adhere to. just be nice to everyone and don’t alienate based solely on gender and presentation, man. Doing shit like this is only going to tear us apart further, which is exactly what the people against this community want.
sorry since realizing my gender i have zero tolerance for the whole “man hating” angle of being queer i hate i hate it i hate you. stop. you are hurting people.
#Also like don’t get me started on how rampant this runs in transmasc spaces and masc aligned nb spaces#Like hey…isn’t this#what you’re aligned with#its just extremely unproductive#and it’s also exactly what the enemy wants??#Also the idea that masculinity is the antithesis of queer is entirely wrong#like queerness is not femininity#Queerness does not come from femininity as a whole#Being queer is to exist outside of societal norms#so yes#that does include trans men#gay men#and all sorts of men#Also saying that you hate all men is a huge generalization that’s just harmful#Because not all men have the priveleges that cis straight white men have#Like think trans men#and men of color#but even then that doesn’t make cis straight white men the enemy??#The system we live under is the problem and it always has been#Also the phrase “not all men” is horrible under a specific context#like its origins are fucked up as hell and it should never be used in response to S/A like it has been#But the thing is that it’s true OUTSIDE OF CONTEXT. it’s really not all men#There are horrible people in every single group ever#If we could make teach the boys we raise and help the guys around us then maybe we’d be better off#It’s just unproductive and cruel to be so hateful#its exactly what the people against our community want#Also also it’s weird hearing straight women say that they hate men#Like hey girlie. I thought you were supposed to like them??#Just say you hate your boyfriend or husband idk#Anyway yeah it’s just unproductive and cruel and we as a community need to do way way better than we’re doing rn
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genderqueerdykes · 6 months ago
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there really is a cultural pressure for transmascs & men to detransition, and it comes from all sides. it comes from the queer community too, not just terfs and cishet transphobes.
it took me a while to realize why transphobic people and transandrophobic queers utterly despise trans guys & mascs who are over the age of like 25- it's because it pisses them right off that we've resisted their attempts to make us detransition. it makes them so angry to see they were unable to groom that person into a life of self-shame and repression. it really seems like MOST people believe that trans men will just detransition eventually in life? people NEVER think about older trans men, only teenage trans boys and trans men in their very early twenties.
when i was involved with my local punk scene i was addressed with condescension, almost everyone around me didn't accept transmasculinity as a legitimate identity and thought that we would've transitioned by now in life. i encountered folks who would talk about transmasculinity with subtle disgust that made me feel like i was doing something wrong, and people who expressed overt disgust, saying in plain english that they were disgusted by breasts and vaginas because they were gay men. all along the way i was literally mocked for not having a penis, and one of my roommates started treating me differently once they found out i didn't have one (because they were attracted to me)
i've been on T for 9 years, and been out as a trans man for a bit longer than that, and i noticed as i've aged i've also attracted a lot of folks who have tried to deter me from identifying as a trans man, either through directly telling me that trans men are inherently dangerous, or by implying that women or another gender are safer, quieter, calmer, "less traumatizing to be around," etc. one of my exes told me they were terrified to date me (despite literally going out of their way to do so for over half a year) because they were scared i would be transphobic to them because i'm a transmasculine lesbian.
i received pressure from online friends to either detransition and become an intersex butch woman, or to something feminine adjacent or nonbinary. for years i dealt with a few friends who kept subtly hinting that i should stop identifying as a trans man or trans masc because of how awful transmascs are- going as far as to sending me screenshots of transmascs speaking, complaining about them and calling them whiny, annoying. talking about how all transmascs are entitled, how all transmascs take things too personally, how we complain too much, and so on.
people make no effort to make space for transmascs and men. i met 0 transmascs in my local punk community that i was able to stay in contact with. none. i met a few in passing but none that actually were introduced to me in a capacity where i could actually try to befriend them. it really felt like other punks in the scene were desperately trying to keep the transmascs apart at times. excuses were made as to why i couldn't hang out with other transmascs i liked, but i was constantly being forced to befriend transphobic cis gay men and transandrophobic transfemmes who outwardly expressed hatred and disgust of us. it really felt like it was on purpose... almost as if other members of this community wanted our attention, but never wanted us to give each other attention or a sense of community. like we were objects, not people to be included in the community for real. satellite friends, if you will.
i'll be honest with you. i was at my lowest at this point. i realized i wasn't just a trans man and that i'm a genderqueer person who experiences multiple genders, including womanhood and an "other" gender, which was great. however now i was being forced to completely stuff down being a man for the sake of other people. instead of folks telling me they'd rather not hang out with transmascs, folks rather just attempted to guilt me for identifying as such in the hopes i'd stop identifying that way. i was being told daily that trans men and mascs are inherently violent and terrible to be around. i was in discord servers where transmascs were being kicked constantly for getting even slightly upset about transandrophobia, or being unfairly targeted by staff.
it's violence, but nobody wants to call it that. i pulled myself out of there and am now able to contact other transmascs and trans men who are proud of who they are and have elevated me back into a headspace where it's okay to truly be myself. just keep in mind that if you feel like you're in that situation, you're not alone. people who attempt to groom others are often very subtle it's not always up front. they will start slipping in hateful sentiments very slowly and make you feel like maybe they're the ones who are actually right.
it feels good to be an almost 32 year old trans guy. there's nothing to be ashamed about there. people project their feelings on to my gender and that has nothing to do with me. it has nothing to do with you, either. people will just project on to you for whatever reason- hatred is usually the motivator there. if you encounter folks who keep trying to badger you out of identifying as your gender, no matter who you are, transmasc, transfemme, transneutral, trans anything- they are not good for you. they are not your friends. they do not accept you as you are and you deserve so much better.
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tricky-pockets · 2 years ago
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My boyfriend keeps looking at me like 😐... 🥚 when I tell a story that happened pre-transition and it gets funnier every time, so I present to you, in no particular order,
egg shit that SOMEHOW did not tip me off:
Played in numerous d&d campaigns in college; didn't play a lady character even once.
Invented a male persona so I could sub in when my boyfriend's frat was a man short for Beer Olympics.
Maintained that male persona and later pledged the frat.
Was regularly the only girl invited to Boys' Night because "you're a guy like at least 40% of the time anyway".
Planned elaborate costumes every halloween; never once went as a lady or anything lady-adjacent.
Actually won 'Sexiest costume (male)' at a theatre event.
Regularly auditioned for male roles in theatre productions. Landed a small part in an all-female production of As You Like It as Silvius and was never more psyched to be in a play.
Watched Ouran High School Host Club straight through by myself; felt weird and immediately chopped off all my hair about it.
Messed around with my college boyfriend while in boymode, using masc pronouns and an assumed name.
80% of my wardrobe in college was hand-me-downs from that same boyfriend.
Went as a wizard for halloween multiple times as a kid, with the beard and everything; never once considered being a witch.
Invented a male persona in middle/high school just for going to hockey games with my uncle.
Made out with more than one gay dude who said "I don't know what it is about you, I'm usually never attracted to women."
Ended up effectively living in my buddy Jake's dorm room every single year, no matter what my official living arrangements were.
Started wearing Old Spice in high school because a boy I liked wore it and I liked how he smelled. Pulled the same move in college with a particular brand of shampoo.
Wore the men's jeans+high-impact sports bra combo in an astounding number of photos.
And I didn't know! My oblivious ass sat there in my boyfriend's old pants with my titties tied down, calling myself Jack, playing a male illusionist for the 76th time in a d&d game with my frat brothers and making plans to go to Boys' Night afterwards for Streetfighter and beer, and I didn't figure it out.
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epiphainie · 5 months ago
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it's absolutely bonkers to me how easily so many of tommy's scenes in the begins episodes can be read as him being gay and closeted. like we all know they weren't intentionally building that subtext but jesus christ, it works so fucking well. like the team jacob moment was obviously there for hen to witness indirect homophobia at the 118 for the first time but it could be any other way with any other character but no it's tommy and he looks like he's just been caught in the headlights. when will your girlfriend come cook for us comment was just gerrard being a sexist pig but tommy's answer is so awkward, almost nervous, and with the hindsight of season seven it's impossible to not read more into the implications of that reaction. the chicks hate it when you get scars thing is just them shooting shit together after work but coupled with him saying he prefers being single, it almost comes across as him overcompensating for why he is single. even love actually being his favorite movie is like, the show going "hey look, there's more to this guy than just being a masc macho blue collar dudebro" because they want to show chim's influence on him but with the broader context, it again becomes a character moment you read into more, as stereotypical as it sounds
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stormyelliotwritez · 2 months ago
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Idk how comfortable you are with this but like
Logan howlett x masc male reader. Like how would the dynamic go? How would logan figure out he actually likes reader
Also, I myself do wear masc clothes and act more masculine, which is kind of an insecurity I have within the gay community, but I do wear tighter fitting clothes which gives me away sometimes 😂, so maybe throw that into the fic if you’d like?
I’m not sure what you mean by the last part so I’m not going to use it but you can send me another ask and clarify what you wanted
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LOGAN AND THE HOT GUY FRIEND
When Logan first saw you, you were sitting on the couch at Wade’s place. Wade had mentioned you came over sometimes to steal their food when you couldn’t be bothered buying your own. He watched you for a moment before walking closer and sniffing your scent. You were a guy… and you smelt good?
He came up to you and sat down. You glanced at him and then went back to watching the TV. He wasn’t expecting you to just brush him off like that but he guessed you were used to weird stuff happening at Wade’s place.
“So you’re the friend Wade was talking about?”
You turned your head to look at him and nodded. You looked him over and smiled.
“And you must be his new roommate?”
He nodded and then you turned back to the TV. You both sat there contently for a while before Wade came back home and interrupted it and you all had dinner.
The next few times were like that. You’d sit in content silence but each time, Logan found himself staring more at you than the television. You were more masculine than Wade sometimes and you smelled really nice. You’d both just sit there and watch sports or whatever else was on TV. Sometimes his arm would go behind your head and neither of you would mention it.
After a few times, he started talking to you and you started talking back and shared stories but he didn’t like you… right? Sometimes he’d say you looked good but that was just banter between guys, right? And there was no way you liked him.
One time when he came home from doing something and you were there, you were sitting in the kitchen instead. You’d stolen one of his beers and were about to open it. He was about to offer to help with his claw or with a bottle opener when you opened it with your teeth. You spat the cap onto the table and his jaw dropped.
You were the epitome of his type. You were cool and hot and you wore similar clothes to him and you were fun to talk to and you made him feel things, now they were vulgar things but they had been just butterflies in his stomach.
He grabbed a beer, sat down next to you and watched as you chugged it. He wondered if you’d put those lips around something else. With a shake of his head, he shook those thoughts away and started up a conversation again but now he knew that he liked you and damn, did he want you so bad.
pt 2 where they get together?
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